boys on bikes 2

i don't think you realised what you started
when you started it, an innocent glance in the july sunshine
it shone over your hair, your eyes, your face
my reflection in your glasses was a big mistake woah

and we laughed, woah,
and we sang, woah,
and we danced, til the sun went down, woah.
and we joked, we reminisced
i won't forget the afternoon that we first kissed

and every phrase you said to me was like a poem
and every sound you made was like a little song

these boys on bikes distracting me
these boys on bikes confusing me
these boys in bikes are using me
these boys on bikes are losing me

i wonder like a lost soul
i wander like a lost soul

I don't think you realised what you threw away
and innocent glance in the july sunshine
it started with a kiss
and now it's ended up like this
i don't know what you wanted all long

I thought I was just about past it

damn you damn you damn you damn you.

fuck

Why did I do that??

bitta S Club

Have you ever been waiting for something for years and years, and years, and then it finally comes, and it doesn't feel real at all?

pffffffft, I wish.

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Sent:23 March 2010 03:04:26
To:

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Time for another insightful paragraph. Today's theme: sexual orientation.

Ok, so basically, I believe that sexual orientation is just a personality trait. It's just a bit of what we fancy, some people like apple crumble, some people love chocolate gateaux, some people love members of their own sex, and some people love members of the opposite sex, and then there are the people who like a bit of both, it's really ok. I love the smell of petrol and tar. So spank me.

Why do people make such a big deal out of these things? It's just who we are, no one should be ashamed of the way in which the chemicals in our brain are balanced, and people shouldn't look down on those who don't go with the "flow" meaning "the way in which people were ordered to behave in medieval times". This is the 21st century! Things couldn't be better for us, we've got freedom of speech, gay rights, it's all there for a reason. They didn't build the new sports hall at school for us all to continue playing volley ball on the field in the summer.

bugger me, all this drama.

It's annoying! I know that it's not just drama and that there are real people upset in all of this but I still hate it a lot.

+ then there are the people that are just drama queens and there really is no real drama, just really pathetic "Oh she's not talking to meeeee :(" kind of drama that involves the absent reply to a single text, It's sooooo annoying, My group have never really had any dramas, and we don't really bitch about each other that much, we all get on fine, par one, but what can you do?

Tbh, I'm too much of a hippy, I'm just like "peace out dude, whatever will be will be, just forget about the future man, all you need is love" I genuinely want to go and sit in a field and play my guitar, but meh meh meh meh meh, I'm too careless I think. I'm happy though, I think that's the secret of happiness, you just have to stop caring about the stuff that isn't important and ENJOY YOURSELF.

peace out man

Last night...

I had a dream that we were still together, back in the summer, and you beat me up, and I had a bruise the shape of a penis on my cheek. Someone tell me what that means?




I love this gorgeous weather atm. I went for a run this afternoon, I ran straight to my special place and laid down in the grass and looked up at the beautiful clear, twilight sky.

Dear Diary,

Today a massive secret got out about one of my closest friends, a group of us have known for a few months now, but one of us leaked and now pretty much everyone is going to know.
I'm afraid I can't tell you this secret, but this is a pretty big deal for my friend. She's already under so much pressure, with illness and school issues, this is just another spanner in the work for her. If she finds out that everyone knows, I think it will destroy her, and I'm not sure she's going to be able to handle it. She's already breaking down enough as it is. I just hope she doesn't do anything stupid. School kids can be so nasty.

sweeney pondered and sweeney planned

I was having a bit of a fiddle with my "next blog" button when I had an ephiphany. I realised that people don't seem to enjoy reading blogs about how people that they happen to know nothing about, are feeling, and why they're feeling like that, and people don't enjoy looking at pretty photos of scenery. People like goss and juice and semen.

So I think I'm going to give my blog a bit of a re-vamp, I'm going to post some interesting shit for you guys, at some point. When my life gets interesting maybe. Allthough Paul and I are doing a radio show on Saturday, I'll post a link somewhere around here sometime soon for you all to click on and listen in. There's going to be a webcam there too, maybe I'll dance especially for my blog readers, even though I think there are only 7 of you at the moment.

But yeah, for all of you guys that don't know me personally, this is what I actually look like:



I'm the one on the right. ^

Actually that was a lie, I'm the gal on the left.

mehhh

Sad day today, saw some people I hadn't seen in a while.



All those summers I spent down in sussex, I can't even remember what the name of the village they live in is called :( Hanging out on the common with my cousin and her friends, fish and chips on Brighton pier, the horse racing machine, the way my cousin used to get wolf whistled literally everywhere she went and how my uncle paid the woman on the stall to give me a bear when I was too crappy to win my own prize :( I loooooooved it. It's alll just memories now, and I guess everything has to come to an end but it's a really really sad end.

I would actually do anything to take it back to summer 2007 and change everything for the better.

hmmm

urrrgh, I'm tied down to a ridiculous amount of stuff at the moment. Next weekend I'll basically be shut in a radio studio for 72 hours, only to break for work at sound cube and peeing.

Need to practice for the barn, need to revise.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhh, and I really really hate letting people down, but I just want to do something on my own for once! Doing something with someone, especially with someone you don't know that well, or someone who's not particularly reliable, just creates hassle, and you're just like ughhhhhhhh.
I like being busy though, it makes me feel good. I'm good at being busy, because I just go with the flow, I take things as they come, and then I detach............

Easter holidays in two weeks. I will be thankful for the break.

Half Soilders

he's standing tall like a soilder
shooting bullets through my heart,
he can surprise me with kisses like land mines
then he'll bury me back in the dirt.
my man is agile like a spitfire
against the clear blue sky,
he's flying back trying to find me
in this bed alone I lie tonight.

regrets

coming in thousands at a time



I should have just gone there

The Summer List

Peter and I made a list, entailing every single thing that we want to do this summer.
TSL is going to be my Bible this summer.



rep whippy woods
spend too much time in cassiobury park
explore London
get guns in the gym
hit the beach
start a band
get drunk a lot
get laid
party
water fights
camp out
movie nights
go to lots of gigs
the barn
document everything via photos
porn
bike rides through fields
mud fights ?
get naked in public
go to a lido
underage fest

boys on bikes

say those words
spin me round and round
'cause i missed the last train home

i told you we needed to leave
but you'd rather touch up me
and you spent too much time looking for your phone

and you've got your bike
and i've got my feet
and you've got your back pack to hold things

while i have to wait here
and make do with my pockets
and you don't even care

Phwoar are they alike.

Ok, so I have a friend, and to the unfamiliar eye, she's just a skinny redhead with freckles. Just a shy girl, with the brains of a genious, the dark horse of the PE class, indulging in a suspicious romance with the annoying rebel of the form. To me she's a nut case. An exciting, interesting female, intelligent and wild, independent, she doesn't care what they all think about it, and she wants it so bad. She doesn't care that they mix with completely different social circles, they're both pretty extreme characters to the unfamiliar, but phwoar, are they alike and they both know it.

It's the end of an era, and a mighty fine one at that!