I am so pissed off with you right now.

Yes, I gave up precious time I could have been spending with people that actually cared about me, to drink disgustingly creamy hot chocolate with you, while you sat texting my aunt. You may have been grateful for the shoes, but I don't think you were particularly grateful that your daughter put mascara on for you and trekked into town with a gigantic yellow bag full of shoes weighing a tonne. Mike, you have failed me as a father. Yes, I am interested to know what you're doing nowadays, but relationships work two ways and you need to be interested in my life as well.